declutterbug

I had tossed out a lot of old magazines earlier in the year, mainly the Backpacker, Outside and Adventure mags I kept for trip ideas and gear tips. I also got rid of my VegTimes and women's mags. Today, however, I went into the back room and saw 3 of those upright magazine containers...full. I haven't been doing as much outdoor stuff lately. In fact, I haven't led any trips this season. With the exception of one Curve with Jodie Foster on the cover, and some Vegetarian Times and health-type mags, they were all "activity" magazines that are great for those who lead trips and need to keep a steady stream of potential outing ideas coming, but not so crucial for someone who is currently doing research for a conference planning company. Anyway, I decided to toss the whole lot out, or rather to recycle them. I may list them on Freecycle if I have time, but if I don't do it and get a taker by Thursday night, they go right into the recycle bin for Friday pick up. I counted them (because I was curious) and there were *30.* I certainly don't need 30 magazines. What was I thinking?

Here's a link to Dr. Declutter's blog. Enjoy!

I'd like to wish the following items "adieu":

*3 pair of pants.
*Two tee shirts.
*Low top hiking boots.

Alas, T. (who stars in a few posts on this site, because I was afraid to have her down to visit based on what she'd think of our house and its contents) decided she's not going to come stay the night anymore. Five people and all our stuff is too much for her.

She said it nicely, but it still smarts, because no matter how hard I clean, it won't ever meet her standards. There's just not enough time in my day to play maid anymore, or to provide the kind of vigilance needed so that the bathroom floor stays hair-free for the 24 hours she's here. True, when she came down, it was gross, but Ki did a clean up of the kitchen and bathroom while T. and I went for a walk on the beach.

So, what's the problem? Why can't I just do a little more around the house? I work early (up at 6 AM, in the office by 7 AM) and I often teach dance or have dance practice after work, until around 9 PM. When I worked at home, I used my breaks to do everyone's dishes, dust, Tilex the bathroom, etc. Now that I'm offsite, it's much harder. I still come home and clean, but I've been gone all day and I'm tired, and it seems like there's more to tidy lately.

I was all set to do a big clear out when I got this offsite job, but I've lost steam. It seems that from my conversation with T. that even if my stuff was under control and I did a decent clean of the house, it wouldn't appeal to her to come stay. She doesn't like that we only have 1 1/2 bathrooms for 5 of us (6 with her), and that there's not a lot of space for her stuff. I can clear out some space for her, but unless I install another bathroom, which is only marginally more likely than my winning the lottery, the 1 1/2 is all we've got to work with. And I can't do much about my housemates' random stuff.

I guess I'm just used to living with people. Sure, it's a pain sometimes, especially when there's junk that's not mine strewn about, or I just mopped the floor and someone walks over it, but it also has its good points. Our housemates are bright and funny and have big hearts. They welcome any of our reasonably-behaved friends, and they feed and medicate our sweet kitty just about every weekend. Nine times out of ten that's enough to get me to overlook a little bit of bathroom scunge.

So, given T's announcement, while I will keep decluttering, I don't have the impetus anymore to do a giant decluttering right now. I can either spend my limited spare time making things nice--but not nice enough--quickly, or I can make them not-quite- nice-enough on my own time, a few items here and there, in a way that means I still have time to sleep, and dance, and sit in the hammock, and play, and to do the work that brings in money.

I do indeed want the house to look nice. I want it to be clean and decluttered. It's just a bit dispiriting to realize that your best efforts won't be enough for someone you love.

bye bye black jeans...

Hmmm, I am not sure how this works.

declutter

I forgot to say:

3 tees
a blue shiny denim-type vest

Ciao! May the next person who gets you enjoy.

I'm going to be doing a "day job" from 7 AM to 3 PM M-F, and I'm still doing some writing and dance teaching. This will make for a busy schedule and I wonder where the time to declutter will come from. I will have to make some adjustments: ironing a week's worth of clothing at a time (preferable) etc. I am actually hopeful that having a more structured day will point out to me that I need to make time for cleaning and decluttering in a structured way as well, as opposed to now, when I take a break from working and clean the kitchen etc.

5 hats...out the door. Bye bye!

More from Stephanie Roberts at Clutter Free Forever:

Holding on to clutter is a really powerful way to keep from
having to do things differently, or to avoid new activities
and experiences. If you can't get motivated to clean even
one little area, what is that clutter protecting you from?
What it is helping you avoid that might be scary to you?
Clearing out your clutter creates space for change, and
change can be threatening, even if it welcomes in something
good.

If you suspect you may be holding on to clutter for
emotional reasons, don't just grit your teeth and force
yourself to get rid of it anyway. Acknowledge and honor
your feelings. Allow yourself time to explore their deeper
meanings. This is a learning and growth opportunity.

If you are surrounded by clutter because lots of material
things help you to feel secure, first let yourself be okay
with that. Give yourself permission to create a sense of
security without feeling guilty about it. Then, make it a
goal to discover other ways to feel more secure without
needing lots of unnecessary stuff around.

I think she is right here. It's not enough to just force yourself to toss things if there's an underlying issue. Sure, sometimes it works, and you can actually get rid of quite of a lot of stuff that way; I know I have. I also know from experience that sorting out the *whys* can be helpful not only because it helps you get rid of things more easily, but also because it helps you *maintain* things at their less-cluttered level. That's to say if I get rid of 10 bags of "stuff", if I'm really okay with having less around, then that space will stay clear. It won't become a "thing void" to be filled with more (new! better! improved!) stuff.

So a while ago I got rid of TONS of books. Many, many bags. Among them were a lot of glbt books, which went, with all the rest, to Goodwill. Since that time, I've been pretty hard on myself for taking the "easy" way out, instead of looking into how I could donate them to serve the community. For example, about a month after I donated them, I got a note from the Cantu Center at UCSC asking for glbt book donatations. They have 0 budget and a lot of student readers. I was at Sisterspirit in SJ the other night, chatting with a friend, and noticed their used book section. I could have given them to there as well, or to the Diversity Center in Santa Cruz. Alas, I sent them to Goodwill. I know it's probably not a big thing, but I'm still feeling bad about it, because they could be doing a lot of good as a collection somewhere!

Tip #50

While a patina of surface clutter can be tidied and put
away without creating more of a mess, dealing with years or
decades worth of pack-ratted stuff is going to make more of
a mess for awhile, until you get it sorted out. You can't
deal with this stuff without getting it all out of whatever
closets/boxes/drawers it's been stashed in and digging and
pulling out and spreading around so you can see it and feel
it and make decisions about it.

Creating this kind of a mess is important progress... so
long as you take the next step of moving it forward along
its paths to new homes (elsewhere or in well-organized
places in your home for the stuff you decide to keep). If
you start to feel overwhelmed, take a break today, and get
back to clutter-clearing tomorrow.


Don't give up!,

Stephanie Roberts